Which animal would make the greatest best man?

While we've yet to see a case of the slippery-slope-anti-gay-marriage scenario of man-marrying-animal, things did get a bit inter-species at a wedding in Montana last summer when the groom was accompanied to the altar by his 800-lb. best man, a bear.

Naturalist Chris Anderson had adopted Brutus as a baby, and raised the 7-year-old grizzly to be so docile that he plays with children and joins the Anderson family at the table when they have big family dinners.

But in its natural state the grizzly bear is one of the planet's most deadly and remorseless killing machines. If a man-eating grizzly can join a wedding party, it opens up the possibly of culling a best man from just about anywhere in the animal kingdom.

After the jump, the pros and cons of some of the more mainstream animal best men. If you have an argument for a more exotic beast, let us know in the comments.

Dog
Pro: It makes sense that man's best friend -- bred to service our every need for 15,000 years -- would make an optimal best man.
Con: Adam Sandler already did this when he got hitched in 2003. So instead of being unique and edgy you'd be imitating Adam Sandler

Lion
Pro: Having the king of the jungle in your wedding is totally badass. Much moreso than your buddy who's always bringing up how during his wedding Bruce Willis was spotted in the lobby of the hotel.
Con: Your lion best man would scare off most your friends from attending the ceremony.

Parrot
Pro: If you value having anything like the traditional best man toast, the parrot is the only way to go.
Con: Parrots are sort of wussy and, if you remember from Seinfeld, would likely eat the ring.

Chimp
Pro: A proper bachelor party should always include a chimpanzee, so when you make a chimp best man you really simplify everything.
Con: A lot of the poo-throwing antics that go over so well after 12 drinks at the strip club wouldn't go over so well during a wedding. Not to mention any jealous face-ripping of the bride.


Hamster
Pro: These little guys are so furry and snuggly-wuggly that your bachelor party will gather literally twice the usual number of hot, animal-obsessed ladies as it otherwise would.
Con: Said ladies will be too busy cooing at your hamster best man to notice anyone else.